Where hath my Heroes gone?

In our generation there is no such thing as a hero. We all had one at some point in time. Whether it be your parents and the thought that they are indestructible. Or a friend who was always there for you. But then you find that your parents are indestructible and they won't always be there for you. Then your friends grow more distant they make new friends and you find that you're no longer necessary. You find that your saint was nothing but a demon in disguise. Waiting for the opportune moment to crush you until your anguish is unbearable.

So I ask you, where have the heroes gone?

I can see where mine went, but can you still find yours?

No more

I made a huge mistake the night before last. I had rather bad nightmare that made me remember a few things. I woke around midnight soaked in sweat. I remembered things that I only wanted to forget. I made the mistake of letting it get to me. I got up and did the stupidest thing I could have. I did some things that I absolutely regret. I thought it would help me forget. It didn't. And you know what? I don't want to forget anymore. I'm tired of running away from these thoughts and memories. I'm tired of telling my friends and family that I'm fine when I have so much to say. It's time to take responsibility for myself. I hope that one day I can just be me.

~The Dreamer

Rain Rain go Away...

I don't know what to think. I sit here day in and day out. Looking at nothing at all. Nothing means anything to me any more. Why did I get the short end of the stick? Why do the rain clouds darken my thoughts?

Why does this thing called life end so quickly? Why do we have to deal with all this crap? Some times I just wish I could just skip all of this bull shit. Skip all this pain. Or maybe go back. Say my goodbyes. Stop what I wish I hadn't have done. Is it so wrong of me to wish I had done something different? To wish things were different?

Good night children.

~The Dreamer

Its only a matter of time

Do you sometimes feel that chill? As if some one is watching you. Does it make you wish you led a different life. Take my advice. Listen closely to what is said and change. You may not get a second chance.

He comes with the night
He takes what is owed
None can flee
None can hide
For the reaper will find you

Never good enough?

Why is it that I am never good enough for you?
Why is it that you get to walk over me?
Why do you get to tell me what to do?
Why is it that you need to make me feel worse then you?

I have bled for you.. I have restrained myself for so long. I do something right and you just blow it off.

WHY AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH?

Tell me what I need to do.. You just sit there all day... Expecting me to be good and do right when you just do the opposite. Tell me what I need to do to make you look me in the eye again. When did I fail? When did you stop loving me? What have I done...?

I'm done trying to prove something to you. If you can't see that I have been trying then there is nothing left for me to prove. I'm tired of not saying anything.. Sneaking into the basement and punching the wall until my knuckles bleed.

No more will I let you walk over me. No more will I make myself crawl while you walk with your head held high. It's time for something new.

Poetry in the Clouds

You always hear about people soaring above the clouds. The problem is no one actually does it. No matter how much they like how their life is, they still can't fly. Many people like to act like they can fly. It makes those who are honest feel worse about themselves.

I watch life fly by my window
I see my reflection staring back at me
But thats all it is, a reflection

I watch as others soar high above the clouds
I look at my own clipped wings
I wonder what tomorrow will bring

I Am the Nightmare

Do you ever wonder if your dreams or nightmares are what you really are? I hope to god thats not true. Most nights are the same. Pain, horror, waking up in a pool of my own sweat. It frightens me to even think back on those nights. But its not like they happen every night. I used to have them near every night. I am curious as to why I have them. Does the person make the dream or does the dream make the person.

I am the beholder of the Nightmare
I wonder why the they chose me
I hear their mocking laughter
I see them coming closer
I want them to go away

I pretend they aren't there
I feel their breath on my neck
I touch their claws reaching for me
I worry they will get loose
I cry as they come closer

I understand I have them for a reason
I say they will fail
I dream they go away
I try to call out
I hope some will answer..
I am the beholder of the Nightmare

I Am the Dreamer

I am the Dreamer who never dreams
I wonder why it comes
I hear unborn baby crying
I see the pain like a reflection
I want nothing more then to be held by her once more
I am the Dreamer who never dreams

I pretend it never happens
I feel the warmth of her heart
I touch her tear stricken face
I worry it will end
I cry when it does
I am the Dreamer who never dreams

I understand that I can't hold onto the cruel dream
I say I don't need the comfort it brings
I dream that one day the dream will come true
I try to forget it
I hope one day I can
I am the Dreamer who never dreams